Mother's Little Helper

A Very Special Freaky Friday on Monday: My 'Millionaire' Experience

Here’s a little something I’m learning about blogging. When you try to set up a weekly feature (like, say, Freaky Friday), it’s inevitable that it becomes the bane of your blogging existence. Things happen which preclude you from posting in a timely manner, you suddenly run out of anything interesting to write about and/or there’s something you’d much rather be writing about on that particular day, etc. I don’t know about you, but I have enough chores in my ‘real’ life. I want my blog to be a fun place, not just for my readers, but for the writer, too. So Freaky Friday is going to become a bit like the restaurant chain TGIFridays: Friday in name only. I’ll still try to get to it on the Big F, but whenever it happens to appear, you’re guaranteed a gigantic portion of deep-fried strangeness that’ll hit the spot.

On Oct. 22-23, I was a contestant on “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire” (WWTBAM), a nationally syndicated gameshow hosted by Emmy Award winner and co-anchor of NBC’s Today show, Meredith Viera. I taped the shows on August 3rd, 2007, and I can say without hesitation, it was one of the most fun experiences of my life. Here are some of the Frequently Asked Questions about my WWTBAM experience:

How Did You Get on the Show?
One day in July, I happened to be flipping through the local paper when I stumbled upon a small article that said WWTBAM would be holding auditions on Friday at the Cherokee Casino (about 10 miles or so from the town where I live). I immediately called Sean, my DH, and told him that I was going to try out. When the show first began (1999-ish?), several friends had said “You need to be on that show!” I may not be able to remember phone numbers or appointments, but my brain is a sponge for useless information like song lyrics or the names of every actress to play one of Charlie’s Angels.

So on Friday, July 13th, I got up early and headed down to the Casino with my folding chair, a cup of coffee, and my book. Tryouts began at 9 a.m., and I got there at about 7-ish. There were probably a few hundred people ahead of me in line. We were herded into the Casino and handed a questionnaire to fill out. In addition to vital statistics, it asked questions like, “If you were stranded on a desert island, what five things would you want to take with you?”, “What is the one thing in the world that you are better at than anyone you know?” and “What is something you would want to tell Meredith about yourself?” We were broken down into groups, and given refrigerator magnets with the show’s logo on the front. On the back was a number, and this was how you were identified from that point on.

Eventually my group made it into a large room with rows of chairs. We were given a quiz of 30 multiple choice questions which we had to complete in 10 minutes. After the 10 minutes were up, staff people collected our quiz materials, and the Scantron sheets were scored. A producer stood at the front of the room and answered questions about the show and the casting process, and she also threw a few T-shirts out into the crowd. When all of the Scantrons had been graded, the numbers of those who passed (we never learned what percentage you had to answer correctly to move to the next round in the audition process) were read out and those people were asked to remain seated while everyone else – about 85% of the crowd – filed out of the room.

The remaining people in the room were then shepherded to a different room while the next group came in to take their quiz. My group lined up a long a wall and a producer came by and took Polaroid pictures of each of us. Three producers were seated at tables at the front of the room, and they began calling out numbers. Potential contestants would sit with whichever producer called his or her number. The producer collected her Polaroid and the questionnaire she had filled out earlier. The producer flipped through the questionnaire, asked a couple of questions, and within three or four minutes, the interview process was over. According to the producer who had answered the questions in the previous room, we would receive a postcard within 2-3 weeks letting us know whether or not we had made it into the contestant pool. If selected for the contestant pool, we could be called at any time within the next two years and asked if we were available to appear on the show.

A producer called my number and I sat down before him. We had a pleasant conversation in which he asked about my kids’ names, why I wanted to be on the show, and what I would do if I won a million dollars. Then it was over and I went home.

I got home around noon, and at about 3 o’clock, the phone rang. According to caller ID, it was a 212 area code, and I thought to myself “This is someone calling from Millionaire asking me to be on the show.” Then I told myself that was silly and not to get my hopes up. Then I answered the ringing phone. Sure enough, it was the producer I had spoke to earlier asking if I could come tape the show on August 2nd.

Why do you think they picked you?
I don’t know. I was pretty comfortable during the interview process, so the producer probably felt that I wouldn’t be too nervous in front of the camera. Plus, I’m a stay-at-home-mom from a small town in Oklahoma – can’t get much more All-American than that. From what someone affiliated with the show said, they are looking for people who they believe the audience at home will want to root for. According to what one of the main producers told my group in the Green Room, 30,000 people a year try out for 300 spots, so I feel very fortunate and grateful to have made the cut.

How did you prepare for the show?
I immediately started a crash course trying to cram into my brain all the stuff I should have learned but never did. Things like the periodic table of elements, who’s on all of our money, capitals of states and countries around the world, geography, anatomy, zoology, and so on. I answered as many trivia questions as I could, and I played the online version of WWTBAM until I’d seen each question and could answer it without thinking. Of course, none of this preparation helped me for the questions I eventually encountered. But I couldn’t NOT study – I was too afraid that I’d torment myself forever if there had actually been a periodic table or geography question.

Did they pay for your airfare and hotel room?
Nope. In the good ol’ Regis days – when the show was primetime – they would do this, but then again, they also had the Fastest Finger round, where you had to compete against other contestants for a chance in the Hotseat. I’d much rather pay for my transportation and lodging and know I would be in the Hotseat than have a free trip to NY but not get to play for the big bucks.

Is Meredith Viera really as nice as she seems?
No, she’s nicer! Truly, she is an incredibly warm and genuine person. I’ve watched her on the Today show and The View for years, and while she seems interested in the celebrities and dignitaries she interviews, she seems to like the ‘real’ people she comes in contact with on Millionaire so much better. By the time I got home (we went on a previously scheduled trip to the Boston area immediately after my taping), there was even a thank you note from her waiting for me, in which she mentioned my boys and husband by name. Isn’t that awesome?

What’s it like behind the scenes of the show?
You’re with a group of people who have been selected to tape your day. You get to the studio early – by 7:30 a.m. You’re ushered inside, and all of your stuff is put into a locker in a room that will be kept locked. They want you with the knowledge you walked in the door with, not cramming until the moment before you get on camera. You meet the other people in your group, hear from the producers about what to expect, hear from the lawyer about what’s required of you, and head down to the set. You practice getting into and out of the Hotseat and how to enter and exit the stage. You then go to lunch in the ABC cafeteria. Afterwards, you change into your show clothes and have your hair and make-up either done or touched up. Then you settle into the Green Room to cheer each other on, where you watch the tapings via a live feed. You never know what order in which you will be called to play, though if there is anyone left over from the day before, they go first. There were three people on my day who had been heldover from the previous day, so they went before anyone in my group. I ended up being heldover until the next day, and was the last from my group to tape.

One of the great things about being on the show that I didn’t expect was to make so many new friends. You get chummy very fast with people when you’re doing something so out of the ordinary. Most of the people I met were definitely people I’d be friends with under ‘normal’ circumstances, so that’s saying something!

I missed the show – can I watch a copy of it somewhere?
I’m working on that. I’ll let you know as soon as I find out myself. In the meantime, if you’re interested in reading transcripts of the show, you can find them here for day 1 and here for day 2. These are provided by the pros at the WWTBAM Bored, and I would be remiss to not thank them for all of their help and support during my excellent adventure. Most notably, I'd like to give a big cyber-hug to Bored members Bob Juchs and Bob Shore, who were part of my deep Phone a Friend bench.

Did you have a watch party?
Yes, our dear friends, Kristi (kmallett78) and Brad threw me an intimate watch party for at their home. Check out the awesome cake! And the cherry on top? Kristi arranged for me to Karaoke “The Macarena”! (Now my theme song.) I made the above card (recipe at the end of the post) for last weeks’ Limited Supply Challenge on SCS using Beate’s weekend sketch, and most importantly as a thank you card for Brad and Kristi. I do kinda love the way the Glossy Effects make it look and feel like a real TV screen!

What are you going to do with the $50,000 you won?
1. Buy a new playground for our back yard.
2. Work with a professional organizer to help me clear out the clutter in my home.
3. Send my puppy to be professionally trained
4. Give some money to our favorite charities that help special needs children, including Bit by Bit, the hippotherapy (therapeutic horsebackriding) program that my son, Carter, attends.
5. Take Kristi/kmallett78 with me on the Stamp & Cruise being hosted by Gina K. Designs, PaperTrey Ink, and Stamping Bella in October 2008.
6. Buy a few new stamps and stamping supplies…

Supplies used – Stamps (all SU! except when otherwise noted): All in the Family, Stay Tuned, Short-Order Numbers & Alpha, Karen Foster snap stamps, A Muse oval; Paper: Regal Rose, Wild Wasabi, Nena Crest Solar White, patterned paper by KI Memories; Ink: Close to Cocoa, Mellow Moss, Regal Rose, Wild Wasabi, Basic Black, Brilliance Archival Graphite Black; Accessories: Glossy Effects, Copic Sketch Markers, Nestabilities, ribbon, 3-D Dots, circle punch.

Saturday Sketch and Belated Freakshow!

Today I had to take my youngest to Kansas City (about 3.5 hours away) for a doctor's appointment. As I waited during the procedure, I flipped through the most recent PaperCrafts magazine. What to my wondering eyes should appear, but the results of PaperCrafts search for Stamping Royalty! And do you know who was among the five chosen for that supreme honor?! My dear stampin buddy, Jen del Muro!!! Of course, I would never have gotten this out of Jen herself because she's too modest. Me? I'd be shouting it from the rooftops! (By the way, I'm on Who Wants To Be a Millionaire? next Tuesday and Wednesday; this seemed like an appropriate time for a shameless plug. Be prepared to read that fact several times in the days to come...)

The card you're viewing is made with Jen's weekly Sketch for You To Try. For a diagram of said sketch, check www.iheart2stamp.com. I love the funky starburst, and when I saw it, I knew I wanted to join it with these equally fun and funky DoodleFactory stamps, available from Starving Artistamps. To make the starburst, I printed off Jen's sketch and cut it out from there. I taped it onto some Basic Black and trimmed around it with my Paper Snips, then took the template and stuck it onto a scrap of Pumpkin Pie, and trimmed that slightly smaller. Piece o' Candy! And check out my pals, Shannan and Susan's blogs for a different spin on the same sketch. Warning -- they'll make you want to blow off your nobler plans (laundry, in my case) and get inky!

Supplies used: Stamps: DoodleFactory Halloween by Sun Spirit Studios, distributed by Starving Artistamps; Paper: Green Galore, Pumpkin Pie, Basic Black, Elegant Eggplant, Nina Crest Solar White, patterned paper by Cricut; Ink: Brilliance Archival Graphite Black, Elegant Eggplant, Green Galore; Accessories: Black embossing powder, Copic Sketch markers, 3-D Dots, Ribbon, Crop-A-Dile, Spellbinders Nestabilities.

Tiny Bit of Belated Freakiness
Because of the aforementioned doctor's appointment and my lack of planning, I didn't get Freaky Friday to you on time. In an effort for you to find me vulnerable and sympathetic, I'm going to reveal a bit of my underbelly to you. Yes, I'm going to share a few tidbits about myself that some of you may find freaky and quite possibly downright gross. We all have our strange likes -- leave me a comment and share a few of yours! Here are some things I love even if no one else does:

1. McDonald's McRibs -- my DH thinks they're disgusting. Me? I say CHOMP!!

2. raw Pillbury Crescent Roll dough

3. Corduroy -- pants, jackets, shirts (though not all at one time...) -- you name it. It's always in fashion with me. There is something deeply cozy and comforting about cords!

4. Meredith Baxter Birney as Betty Broderick in "A Woman Scorned" and "Betty Broderick: Her Final Fury" -- these are frequently on Lifetime and shown as a double feature. If MBB as crazy Betty is on the tube, I am compelled to watch.

5. Mustard on fried potatoes.

6. Madras plaid (particularly in patchwork), Lacoste shirts, Tretorn tennis shoes, and Bermuda Bags. I thought the Official Preppy Handbook was gospel -- by the time I realized it was a satire, it was much too late; the OPH was already deeply ingrained in my psyche.

7. Self-Help books

8. The cheap scents of Lady Stetson and Forever Krystal (named for the protagonist in Dynasty, for Pete's sake!). I may not have worn these since college, but I still think they smell divine.

9. Kasy Casem and Classic Top-40 radio programming

10. Karaoke

Surely you have some guilty pleasures you're brave enough to claim. And, after reading the above list, you know I'm certainly not going to be one to judge you... : )

Freaky Friday!

I know you're thirsting to get your Freak on, but first things first... (Actually, I just wanted to write "get your Freak on." I don't know why, but it makes me giggle to think of a bunch of middle-aged -- face it! -- rubber stampers using hip-hop terminology.)

Today's Limited Supply Challenge is substitute hosted by Carolyn King/Cammie, a member of the design teams for My Favorite Things and Hanna Stamps!, as well as the creator of Carolyn King Designs available through Gina K. Designs. In addition to being incredibly accomplished in the world o' stamping, she also manages to find time to raise three young children, run, and be very cute. I imagine her house is immaculate and that she does laundry daily, too, in addition to cooking nutritious and delicious meals every evening that her family sits around the table and eats together while discussing current events. Yes, she's such a total package that she could inspire a mean case of Schadenfreude if she weren't also so dang sweet! Seriously -- she's sugar personified. : )

Enough about her and her achievements and slender physique and kindness... Here's the challenge Carolyn issued: make a card for someone battling breast or another cancer, but no designer paper (gasp!) or ribbon (choke!) or hardware (eek!). My friend, Amy, just had her first chemo treatment this past Tuesday. Fortunately, she was feeling well enough by Wednesday to pick up her little guy from preschool, where we waved to each other in the parking lot. Later that day, I saw these awesome tee-shirts at the local college bookstore, so I picked up three; one for Amy, one for me, and one for my MIL, a breast-cancer survivor. I made this little gift card (measures 3.5" x3.5" square) according to Carolyn's harsh directives to include in Amy's package. Aren't those peas adorable?!

Supplies used -- Stamps: Little Pod by Stampendous!, sentiment by A Muse; Paper (all SU!) Shimmery White, Pretty in Pink, Green Galore; Ink: Brilliance Archival Graphite Black; Accessories: Cuttlebug, Marvy Uchida Giga and Mega Scallop Oval Punches, SU! oval punch and word window punch, heart punch, 3-D Dots, Copic Sketch Markers.

Freaky Campaign War Story
Yesterday, I was inwardly moaning and groaning about having to go to two political events that evening. But then, when I considered what was going on at this time last year, I realized things weren't so bad. You see, in October of 2006, we were within a month of DH's first election and at the height of campaigning. You couldn't turn on the local stations without seeing a commercial featuring my husband or his opponent, there were yard signs with either our name on it (yay!) or his opponent's name on it (boo!) in what seemed like every yard, and horror of horrors -- there was the door-knocking. Now, I know that you always see political spouses on TV saying how much they enjoy being on the campaign trail and meeting people and knocking doors, etc. It's my opinion that those people are ... not being truthful or possibly insane. Come on! Who likes knocking on the door of a stranger, interrupting their peace and quiet enjoyment of their home and/or property, introducing oneself, talking about how fabulous your spouse is and why they should support him, and then if they agree, asking to put a sign in their yard or a bumper sticker on their car?!?! I'm shameless for the most part, but even I cringe at that sort of thing. The only thing that makes it remotely bearable is the steadfast belief that the people you're bugging would benefit from your spouse's service.

On my first day of door knocking in earnest -- it was August 1, and I had told DH that beginning August 1, I would knock doors with him at least four nights a week until the election -- we were in the middle of a record-setting heatwave. The temperature was in the hundreds, and the humidity was fierce. We had split up to cover more ground, so Kassie (DH's campaign manager) and I were covering one side of the street and DH was covering the other. We get to a house and I ring the door bell. A large man comes to the door. He was well over six feet tall and must have weighed over 300 pounds. He is wearing nothing but his underware. Not boxers, mind you, but briefs. I went through my spiel, and kept my gaze above his neck at all times. He listened intently and even asked a few questions before taking a brochure and saying, "Boy, it sure is hot, isn't it?" As Kassie and I walked down the street to our next house, neither one of us looked at each other. "Is that a common occurrence?" I asked. Kassie, a veteran campaigner (and thus insane by definition) said, "No. That's a first." My entree into the glamorous world of door-to-door politicking had officially begun.

FREAKY FRIDAY!

My husband is a pretty good guy, but he can be a tiny bit… sanctimonious when it comes to issues of food and drink. (Sorry, honey, but you know it’s true. Love you!) For example, he thinks I’m being extremely high maintenance when I tell the folks at Subway that I want “easy lettuce, no tomato” on my sandwich. It’s Subway, for Pete’s sake! They make your sandwiches to order!!! And since the beginning of time, he’s tried to convince me that the world would be a more peaceful, happier place if I would just drink my coffee black. NEVER!! As I have told him for years, I like my coffee like I like my men: rich and sweet. A perfect cup of coffee for me has two Splendas and enough fat-free Coffeemate to be the same shade as Creamy Caramel. Perhaps I have the sophisticated palate of a five year-old, but if I can’t drink my coffee just so, I’d rather not have it. I can see Sean and I having the same discussion about my coffee when we’re in our dotage. And you know what? That’s a little comforting, for some reason.

Yesterday I ran out of Coffeemate. I was about to throw out the container, when I had a flash of brilliance – this would be a perfect project for this month’s Dirty Dozen “Lost & Found” challenge to recycle an item normally destined for the trash! I could make a cute container from which to pour my beloved Coffeemate, and simply refill it from here on out! I took a craft knife and carefully cut off the wrapper, hoping to use it as a pattern, but alas, that shrink-wrappy stuff can’t be duplicated through paper without a whole lot of wrinkling. Because of the curves of the canister, I thought the patchwork technique that I use to make my pumpkins might be a better way to go. A few pieces of dp inked with Staz-On, a little ModPodge, and my container just needed a wee bit of embellishing to finish. The star of my “Lighten Up” brand of creamer is none other than the DoodleFactory character, Zot. I wanted to make him look as pathetic as possible, in serious need of a caffeine fix, so I decided to make him flesh colored. After all, is there any situation in which you’d feel more vulnerable than being naked?? (If you can’t relate to that statement, you’re probably svelte and toned and I probably don’t want to be your friend. No offense.) The tag was made with shrinky-dink stuff.

Supplies used: Stamps – Zot from DoodleFactory Creatures by Sun Spirit Studios, distributed by Starving Artistamps; Paper – Chocolate Chip, patterned paper by Flair and Creative Memories; Ink: Staz-On Saddle Brown, Brilliance Archival Graphite Black; Accessories: Coffeemate container, ModPodge, Copic Sketch markers, clear embossing powder, ribbon, shrink plastic, 3-D Dots, Creative Memories cutting system, Marvy Uchida Giga Scallop oval punch.

Poor Stella
I know this has been a long post already, but I do owe you faithful Freaky Friday Fans (both of you) a good and weird-but-true story. Since I’ve been speaking of coffee, I’d like to share with you the story of poor Stella Liebeck. Stella’s story was one of my favorites to tell my students in my previous life as a college professor. They were always amazed at how the truth of her plight was so much different than the pervasive myth surrounding her case.

When I say “McDonald’s hot coffee case,” what do you think of? Frivolous lawsuits? Some dumb lady who got millions of dollars because she spilled hot – duh! – coffee while she was driving her car? Well, get a load of the real story.

In 1992, Stella Liebeck was a 79 year old woman sitting in the passenger seat of her grandson’s car as he drove through a McDonald’s drive-thru in Albuquerque, NM. After receiving their order, the grandson pulled forward and then stopped his car momentarily so that Stella could add cream and sugar to her coffee. She put the Styrofoam cup between her legs and tried to pry off the plastic lid. When she did so, the entire contents of the cup spilled on to her lap. She was wearing sweat pants at the time which absorbed the coffee and held it next to her skin. She suffered full thickness burns (aka 3rd degree burns) over 6% of her body, including her inner thighs, perineum, buttocks and genital and groan area. She was hospitalized for 8 days, during which time she underwent skin grafting and debridement treatments. TO HER INNER THIGHS AND GENITAL AREAS!!! When she was released, she sought to have McDonald’s pay her medical bills which totaled $20,000. McDonald’s refused.

During discovery, Stella’s attorneys were able to prove that there had been more than 700 claims by people burned by McDonald’s coffee during the previous decade. You see, coffee in your carafe at home is about 135-140 degrees. McDonald’s coffee was held at between 180-190 degrees. They did this because consultants advised this was temperature to maintain optimum taste. Unfortunately, as an expert in thermodynamics applied to human skin testified, liquids held at 180 degrees will cause full thickness burns to human skin in two to seven seconds. Other evidence showed that as the temperature of liquid decreases to 155 degrees, the burns relative to that temperature decrease exponentially. In other words, had Stella’s coffee been held at 155 degrees, she would have been able to avoid serious burns.

When you get coffee in the drive-thru, where do you intend to drink it? I don’t know about you, but I plan to drink it in my car. Virtually all of the students I polled with that question over the years said the same thing. You know what McDonald’s argued? That their customers buy coffee on their way to work or home with the intention of consuming it once they arrived at their destination (despite their own research which showed otherwise).

The jury awarded Stella $200,000 to compensate her for her injuries, and then reduced that to $160,000 because they also found her to be 20% at fault in the spill. The jury awarded her 2.7 in punitive damages as well (about two days of McDonald’s coffee sales). Eventually this amount was reduced by the judge to $480,000 (or treble damages – a statutory limit that punitive damages can only be three times the amount of compensatory damages; 3 x $160 K = $480,000), though he stated that he thought McDonald’s conduct was reckless, callous, and willful. But no one really knows how much Stella actually got, because the parties entered into a secret settlement (rather than duke it out for years in the appellate court system).

After the verdict, the Albuquerque McDonald’s started holding it’s coffee at a temperature of 158 degrees.

In summary, McDonald’s could have gotten out of this case early on for only $20,000. And I don’t know about you, but there is no amount of money that would make me want to go through skin grafting and debridement down there! If only she had drank her coffee black…

Okay, class dismissed. Enjoy you’re the rest of your Freaky Friday.

(Note: the bulk of my facts about the Stella Liebeck case are paraphrased from an ATLA fact sheet, copyright 1995, 1996 by Consumer Attorneys of California)

FREAKY FRIDAY!

Today’s Freaky Friday topic is SKUNKS. Yes, you read that properly, skunks. Why skunks? Because at the moment, my house, everything I own, and I daresay my family all reek of that oh-so-distinctive odor. I have a seven-month-old yellow Lab, Diva, who – though adorable -- is a colossal pain in the rear. And apparently a skunk agreed, and let its rear do the talking by squirting her with a goodly amount of its stuff. We figured this out on Tuesday night, when Diva came bounding into the house, jumped on our bed, and started rubbing her face all over the duvet as if trying to rub something out of her eyes. I sniffed the air and there was an intensely acrid smell, like burning rubber. Sean recognized what it was and immediately put Diva outside, but the damage had been done. I’m letting the groomer work on Diva – my days of washing dogs in tomato juice are behind me. As for the house, from what I can tell, ventilation and time are the only things that are going to rid us of the stench we’re becoming way too comfortable with.

I grew up in Alexandria, Virginia, and we would take annual vacations to Oklahoma to visit my mother’s family. I came to associate the smell of skunk with Oklahoma for some reason, and every time I smelled skunk (I didn’t know what it was at the time) I would sniff and say “It smells like Oklahoma!” Now, more precisely, it smells like a specific address in Claremore, Oklahoma.

Here are a few freaky skunk facts:

• The word “skunk” come from an Algonquian word which means “one who squirts.” Gross.
• Skunks can shoot their bad-smelling spray only about two yards, but you can smell it up to two and a half miles away.
• Skunks have very poor vision. They can’t see objects more than 9 or 10 feet away from them with any clarity, which is one of the reasons they often end up as roadkill.
• There is a large group of people who enjoy keeping skunks as pets. Believe it or not. Here’s their official website. And, if you live in the Daytona Beach area, you can attend the 19th Annual Skunk Show at the La Playa Hotel on October 6, 2007.

Bloggers' Challenge -- I'm their Guest, I'm their Guest, I put their challenge to the test!
Here's a little card I made as a guest stamper for the Bloggers' Challenge coordinated by Lisa Somerville. Some of your favorite stampers are part of this challenge group, I'm sure, so it was a real honor for me to play with them. This week's challenge was to use a spectrum ink pad. Confession: I've had this Celebration spectrum pad for several months now, but had yet to use it. In fact, I've never used a spectrum pad before, so this was kind of a baptism by fire! The Love Bus image was colored with Copic Sketch markers and Copic Spica glitter pens, then colored over with a VersaMark pen and heat embossed with clear ep. It's mounted on a 3-D dot. The exhaust is made with A Muse twinkle stickers. The Mega Scalloped oval background was made with an SU! Celebration spectrum pad on glossy cardstock using the Bouncing Brayer method, then framed with a Basic Black Giga Scalloped oval.

Supplies used: Stamps -- Image by A Muse, sentiment by Hampton Art Stamps; Paper: Basic Black, Pink Passion, glossy cardstock; Ink: SU! Celebration spectrum ink pad; VersaMark, Basic Black, Brilliance Archival Graphite Black; Accessories -- Copic Sketch and Spica markers, A Muse Twinkle stickers, brayer, Marvy Uchida Giga and Mega Scalloped Oval punches, ribbon, 3-D dots, clear embossing powder.

Happy Mail!
I met Jen del Muro at a shoebox swap in Arlington, TX, last spring, and we just hit it off. She's such a cool chick (proof: she and her hubby are big Sooner fans despite living on the other side of the Red River) how could we not?! Anyway, she and I did a little one-on-one 3-D swap this month. I sent her one of my pumpkins, and lookie lookie what I got! Isn't it gorgeous?! Not to mention the fact that she also sent this spectacular fall card. Am I a lucky gal or what?

And take a look at this darling BRAK sent to me by Tinla Woo from the A Muse Addicts group -- isn't it just precious? More stamps to add to my infinitely long A Muse wish list!

Thanks Jen and Tinla!

FREAKY FRIDAY!

Aren't you excited?! Freaky Friday is back, and this time, it's actually on Friday! So here's a freaky little card for your viewing pleasure. Yes, that's another Doodle Factory image from Starving Artistamps -- it's from their Halloween line. He's cute and creepy, don't you think? I made this for today's Limited Supply Challenge, which is to make a card using only 3 or 4 layers and simple embellishments. And let me tell you, this truly was a challenge. I didn't realize how many layers I tend to use until I have to count them. This card has four layers: a Pumpkin Pie base, the second layer made of Basic Black and the large Polka Dot, the circle behind the image, and the image layer. I actually had to do a lot of rearranging and changing from my initial plan as I went along, but I'm pleased with how this turned out.

Supplies used: Stamps -- Doodle Factory Halloween by Starving Artistamps, seniment by A Muse; Paper -- Pumpkin Pie, Basic Black, dp from Making Memories' Halloween Embellishment Paper pad; Ink -- Brilliance Archival Graphite Black, VersaMark; Accessories -- Copic Sketch Markers, ribbon from Hobby Lobby, brads, seafoam white embossing powder, Creative Memories cutting system, 3-D Dots

Pumpkinhead
So you’ve seen the Pumpkinhead card. Do you remember Pumpkinhead, the movie? Well, it came out in 1989, so it’s a little bit dated. In case you didn’t see it, here’s the gist of it: some teenagers are camping (yeah, my mom always let me go camping with friends w/o supervision when I was in high school…) and they kill this boy in an accident then cover it up. The dead boy’s dad wants revenge and with the help of a local witch, they bring Pumpkinhead to life. Pumpkinhead starts killing the teens involved, but then Dad has second thoughts and eventually comes to the teens’ aid.

Whatever.

But this is the wee bit spooky part. Pumpkinhead is apparently based on a poem by Ed Justin. Try as I might, I cannot find any information on said poet. Is Ed Justin real, or is he a hoax? If he isn’t real, then who wrote the Pumpkinhead poem? And what is the Pumpkinhead Poem? Well, I can at least answer that last question for you.

Keep away from Pumpkinhead,

Unless you're tired of living,

His enemies are mostly dead,
He's mean and unforgiving,
Laugh at him and you're undone,
But in some dreadful fashion,
Vengeance, he considers fun,
And plans it with a passion,

Time will not erase or blot
A plot that he has brewing,
It's when you think that he's forgot,
He'll conjure your undoing,
Bolted doors and windowsbarred,
Guard dogs prowling in the yard,
Won't protect you in your bed,

Nothing will, from Pumpkinhead.

Ooooh. Scary! And, of course, FREAKY!!!

Introducing: Freaky Friday!

Okay, I get that I'm a little bit late with this (isn't that the story of my life?), but this is idea o' mine is just too genius to sit on it a week. Some blogs bring you sketch challenges, others bring you guest designers, and blog candy is ubiquitous (though I never seem to win any. What's up with that?). But I'll bet this is the only stamping blog to bring you a weekly entry devoted to the peculiar, deviant, and downright bizarre. Yes, dear readers, I make the bold prediction that Freaky Friday will be Mother's Little Helper's claim to fame! You never know -- and right now, neither do I -- what form the strangeness may take, but every Friday you'll see something here to make you wonder a wee bit about my sanity and/or character. Fun, fun, fun!

For example, take this card I made for Friday's Limited Supply Challenge on SCS. The challenge was to use non-traditional embellishments; no buttons, ribbon, designer paper, or anything else you might find at a stamping/scrapbooking store were allowed as enhancements. So, I began massaging my wee little brain for something unique to build a card around. My little brain recalled that Thursday's Ways to Use It Challenge was to use something spiral-ish on a card, which then led to the free association that I had just placed a spiral bound cookbook in my Goodwill basket (aka the Home of Misfit, Rejected, and Unloved Items; if Santa had one of these, that's where Hermie-the-dentist-elf and Rudolph would have met).

Knowing I would finally get a chance to use the weird little chicken head stamp I picked up in NYC, I searched for a chicken recipe. "Mexican Chicken" looked promising, and made me long for A Muse's sombrero stamp. Eventually, I settled for Bar-B-Q Chicken once I consider the fiendish option of perching Mr. ChickenHead on the grill stamp. A chicken wire background stamp and a few twist-ties in the corner and here you have a truly twisted card!

Supplies Used: Stamps -- chicken head by Catslife Press, grill by Creative Mode, distributed by Gina K., skinny oval by A Muse, sentiment by Rubber Soul, steam/smoke from Like It a Latte by Stampin' Up!, chicken wire background by JudiKins; Paper (SU! unless otherwise noted) -- Cool Carribean, Real Red, So Saffron, Georgia Pacific White; Ink -- Palette Hybrid Noir Black, Real Red (SU!); Accessories -- cannibalized -- freaky! -- recipe book page, twist-ties, piercing tool.

And now, here's some non-stamping related* strangeness for you to ponder...

Foot Binding
My book club's selection for this month is Snow Flower and the Secret Fan by Lisa See. It's a historical novel set in nineteenth century rural China, so naturally, the practice of foot binding is prominently featured. Which, when I heard about what we were reading, made me squeal, "Foot binding?! Oh, good!" I have to admit to a longstanding fascination with this peculiar tradition. (Freaky!)

Here's a little primer on foot binding in case it hasn't been one of your areas of interest: way back when, there was a Chinese prince who had a concubine who he claimed walked as if "skimming over golden lilies," whatever that means. As a result, it became very fashionable and sought after for women to have tiny feet. The smaller the feet, the better a girl's marriage prospects. At around age five or six, girls had smaller toes broken and their feet wrapped with wet bandages which would constrict further as they dried. They were re-bandaged every couple of days, for two years. After this time, the girls/women would have to wrap their feet each day in dry bandages so that their feet would maintain their tiny shape. Ideally, a foot would be about the same length as a thumb.

While this may seem unthinkable to us now, is it really so different from other forms of physical mutilation that we take for granted? Historically, people (most often women) have deformed themselves in any number of ways to seem more attractive to the other gender. Whether it's making a tiny waist via corseting, lengthening the neck with brass rings, stretching lips and earlobes with plates, or the scarification common in many African tribes, is it really so different from piercings and tattoos? We think we're far more progressive and wonder who could possibly think itty bitty hobbled feet are desirable; could it be that future generations will look back and say "Why on earth did all of those women get breast implants? What's so great about big boobs?"

What do you think?

* = I mentioned in my last post that I was going to a birthday lunch with my friends Kayla and Joan. They are thus far the only two 'civilians' (except for DH) to view my blog. One of their first comments: "It sure is... crafty." :)